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IRRITABLE MALE SYNDROME EXAMPLES

Apparently men are ruled by their hormones just like their distaff half. “Lack of testosterone leaves men bad-tempered, emotional, depressed and suffering from irritable male syndrome, scientist Gerald Lincoln, from Edinburgh’s Human Reproductive Scientists Unit, told BBC radio’s Today Show recently.”

I realize it’d be hard to distinguish Irritable Male Syndrome (IMS) from a man’s regular grumpy old self, so let me try to give you a few comparisons, as I see them.

If you make your man his favorite meal of meatloaf and mashed potatoes and serve it to him as soon as he gets home and he complains that the potatoes aren’t lumpy enough, it could be IMS.  If he asks you why it’s leftovers again  then he’s just being his grumpy old selfish self.   Especially considering it’s not leftovers.

If he’s the leader of a nuclear nation and launches a preemptive nuclear strike against his bordering neighbor because his favorite cheese from there has doubled in price, then it could be IMS and the end of the world.

If he just adds the neighboring nation to his axis of evil list, then maybe he’s only being grumpy because his wife says that, since there are no coupons for his cheese and now costs too much, she’s crossing it off her grocery list

If his wife forgets to pick up his dirty clothes, after she makes dinner, does the dishes and puts the kids to bed while he watches 3,000 basketball games in a row during March Madness then during a commercial he calls her fat and lazy, it’s borderline.  But then  his wife beats him to death with the business end of her sweeper.   Clearly,  it’s justifiable homicide due to IMS and pure laziness.

If the man has both a wife and a girlfriend and he’s so obnoxious to both that they get together and hang him up naked by his heels in a public park next to his other girlfriend’s apartment in the winter time.  Then he’s probably got IMS and perhaps some personal protruding  frostbite that could require amputation, much to the delight of all the women in his life.

If he just complains to both his girlfriends and his wife that their other lives are interfering with  his down time, then he’s only being grumpy and risks getting gutted in his sleep by his loved ones.

Well folks, those are some of the subtle differences that I can see between irritable male syndrome and just being a grumpy old man, no matter how young your man may be.